I have so much to update this blog with, but I feel like I can't do that until I write a few words about Meggie's funeral. They held it on Saturday, July 14th in the stake center because so many people wanted to attend and honor the woman we all loved. The Porters put together a beautiful meeting and shared stories about Meggie.  Although it was sad to say goodbye, they lifted us all with their words of faith. I have always loved the Porters, but I have never been so proud of their friendship.

The weeks following her death, our little family spent packing, moving and driving all over the West and Midwestern states. As much as I loathed the job, it was a great distraction. I couldn't breakdown because James and the boys needed me to hold it together. But now that all the boxes are nearly unpacked and the chaos is starting to settle, I find myself missing her more than ever before. I started missing Mehgan even before she died, and although I wanted her to be free from pain, I now feel the loneliness of her absence so powerfully that some days my little heart just wants to break. I know she is in a better place and I know that I will see her again; it's just hard to accept how far away that reunion will be. But, as Elder Maxwell said, "Faith in God includes faith in his timing." It is as it should be, even if I don't understand it all right now.

Earlier last week I had a reminder of that when I was feeling particularly low about missing my friend. I had been  having so much fun here in Kansas but realized again that I couldn't share it with Meggie. That night I left James in charge of bedtime and headed out for a stroll around campus. (On a side note, all Summer long our little family has been trying to spot a skunk because our little men took such a fancy to these stinky furry friends and we thought it would be neat to see one in the wild). Even though we saw all sorts of skunks sleeping on the side of the road (read "dead"), none of us saw the real thing until last week when James spotted two little skunks wrestling near his vet building on campus. So in my sorry state I wandered up to his vet building in hopes that I would see something cute and furry to lift my spirits.

I waited and waited and nothing came. The night grew dark and the cicadas buzzed, but no little black and white friend came to my rescue. So I started praying. I told Heavenly Father how much I missed my Mehgan and how sad I am that I don't get to have her with me on this earth to grow old with. I told Him how sad I was the my little men will not get to have her around as an aunt and godmother while they grow up and that I can't share all my happy and sad moments with her and hear her say, "Oh Mali-Pali" again. My burden felt lighter the longer I prayed but I still felt alone. Then just as I was finishing up, I told Heavenly Father how bummed I was that I didn't get to see those skunks and how much I wanted to see them. 

As I finished up and turned to leave, across the lawn in the shadows I noticed a small creature shuffling along. As I looked closer, I realized that it was a small striped skunk rooting around the grass! I don't know what I was expecting, but this little fella was so tiny and cute I could hardly believe it! The longer I stood there, the closer he came until I was just about fifteen feet away from the little guy! Finally, after I took about a trillion poor-quality cell phone pictures, he had enough and scampered under a rock to free himself from his #1 fan. But fifteen minutes was all that I needed to be reminded that Heavenly Father loves his children and that all things will work together for our good.

For whatever reason, Meggie's time here on earth was shorter than we expected. But I do know that that it will be for the best in the end if we all keep trusting in our Heavenly Father's plan. How grateful I am that our Savior made it possible for us to overcome death and sin so that we can be reunited again.

As one with a soft spot for all living creatures, Meggie would have LOVED this little guy!